Friday, February 5, 2010

"I LOVE YOU" - say it before its too late.

Dear all..

Thank you for coming back to my blog. Today, I read my other entries and I realized that I havent really expressed anything significant to all of you especially to my students. I mean, suddenly I feel like..what if I might not turn up in class next week cause it is time for me to go? ...You know... to meet God The Almighty.....Who knows when the time is up???

Well, Im not trying to be creepy here but in the midst of preparing myself for my trip to Spain this March.... planning to move into my own house end of April..... the agony of juggling the odd hours of teaching ......between being a mother, lecturer, wife and teacher.....all this will no longer be important...
When the time comes.........phew.....something to ponder right?
Well, whether I am READY to meet the CREATOR is another BIG question :-(
This is when, suddenly .......I have the urge to say this to you - that ...."I lOVE YOU". (Even if I have said it before).
I love you because you are the reason why I work anyway. To say that Im crazzy in love with my job is not really it. Most of the time I ended up feeling tired and actually feel like "what if I could reserve this energy at the turf instead? or be at the lake for my brisk walking 'magical moments'.. But then...the feeling would last only for a few days and later the itchyness to be back in front of the class keeps crawling back.
Then, it dawn on me that I actually love sharing the little knowledge I have and seeing you" turn into that butterflies in front of me.."
I will never admit that I am the best teacher.Nor do I want any of my students to say Im a lousy one. "Yang sedang-sedang aje" is fine with me. But that is also not important. What I honestly hope is that every time when we meet, you learn something from me (well, I on the other hand, sometimes learn from you guys!) Especially the IT thingy which you will then give me that very sympathetic look while saying "Its ok madam..we understand.." A confirmation of our generation gap hahahahahah..
Ah.....but u know what? Everytime u say "Its ok madam...."do you know how it feels?? It feels good ...hehe.....
Let me share with you another thing that I feel.
Do you know that whenever I'm harping over the issue of "Please READ during your semester break" do you know how I feel?? I feel like if you were to take that would have learn ENGLISH in the MOST SIGNIFICANT way that you would never imagine!
Well, every English teacher can teach u grammar including me but by doing so, you are treating English like you r learning Maths! Gosh! where is the fun in it??? Maths is maths and English is English people! (Do you realize that I hv just tranformed myself into that 'motherly' tone?)
Well, because I love you, just like a mother, I will always say "PLEASE READ".
Hahahahha...enough of this..lets get bck to the issue of expressing ourselves before it is TOO LATE.
The other day, my daughter wrote something on a drawing block. She told me that she would put it inside my beg and asked me to take a look at it..
As usual...I was so busy running here and there, I soon forgot about it until this morning I found and opened it.
It says...... "Dari pada Teh untuk ibu. I love u ibu.Ibu sihat tak.Teh sayang ibu.Ibu kat mana.I love u ibu. Ibu beranak kan teh sakit sangat. Ibu jaga diri ok ibu jangan demam teh sayang ibu." ... daughter is only 7 years old. How on earth she knows that giving birth is painful??? I must have mentioned it to her once when we had that conversation in the car. She asked me then, whether it was painful to bring her into this world. I said yes, of course.
I said..... Imagine teh..... like moving your bowels (well, what else can I say?).... but this time....the size you have to push is the size of a small football. Well.... that,made her drop her jaw....
Well, honestly people, the pain of giving birth is beyond any imagination..the pain is unbearable...undescribable.... unless you go through it yrself love you mothers and your wives when you are married.

So, because of that 'card' from her...and also the sudden urge to express myself, here is my entry for tonight..and if I remember to scan that card from her, I will do so the next time around....and remember this...I DO LOVE YOU.

Take care


Puteri said...

dear madam :)

thank you for the great reminder and shared with us your story:)
I LOVE you too madam <3 <3 <3

- Izzati Lokman -

Anonymous said...

madam.thank you for this meaningful entry..May Allah bless u.

Anonymous said...

s0 madam, i d0 l0ve y0u!!


Anonymous said...

i love you too madam...

(your daughter is so cute)

Afiq said...

reading this entry, it fits what i'm feeling as of this moment.
even though it is not me who in the dilemma of meeting our Creator, the sentiment is towards my late grandmother.
she just passed away last Sunday and i was unable to meet her until the last moment.
A week before, i was in Singapore but i didn't met her. i promised her i will visit at the end of the month. Little that i know that i won't be able to do so a week later.
I arrived just as she was carried away to the graveyard and what hurts me the most is that i was unable to meet her till her last moment and and tell her how much i love her. She took care of me for as long as i can remember and it pains me that i couldn't repay her well enough.

Death comes in an instant. do what u must before u or the others unable to do so.

p/s: i'm sorry madam i can't attend for EOP classes this week. I'll make up in the next class.

without wax,
afiq hamzah
EOP section 32

husna tawfiq said...

i love you too madam..<3
well, truthfully you have thought us so many thing about life..
personally, i'm glad and thankfull to allah for giving me chance to meet a person like you..
hopefully, we can meet again soon..
if its not in this world..
insha allah, we'll meet again in Allah's garden.. :)

Anonymous said...

thanks madam for reminder..actually, i realize i'm rarely show and say i love mom and dad..eventhough i really really love them and if i they want give all their pain to me, i could take it even it will make me die..however, i'm too shy to show and say that word..after this, i will try to throw away the the shyness..i'll do my best to repay all their sacrifice and love..thanks madam..i'm a lucky person to meet u too..

nor atiqah said...

it remembered me, when my best friend was passed away. she invite me to sleep in her room after we have group discussion, but i refuse, and just wanna go back to my room. the next day, i got the news, she passed away by an accident. i am very sad, because never have a chance to say thank u because teach me in study, sorry if anything hurt her and can't say i love her. but what i can do now is just pray for her..
to my parent,friend,teacher, and all people around me..i love u all..


sya said...

dear madam..
i love u too madam..
i feel so thankful to Allah because give me chance to meet you and i learn so many things from you.thanks madam